Tuesday, October 28, 2008

A Relational Ministry of Place-Sharing

Last week I was on the campus of Gordon College for a youth ministry symposium. The lecturer for the symposium was Andrew Root. Root is the assistant professor of youth and family ministry at Luther Seminary and recently released a book called Revisiting Relational Youth Ministry: From a Strategy of Influence to a Theology of Incarnation.

What this guy had to say has pretty much rocked my world.

To begin with, Root is all about relational ministry. This may sound redundant to you—like saying ATM machine—but it’s been my experience that we can’t assume that all ministry is relationship oriented. Nevertheless, he draws a stark distinction between a relational ministry of influence, and a relational ministry of place-sharing.

According to Root, when relationships are used to influence we treat relationships as a means to an end. In other words, relationships are a vessel that we use to arrive at some other desired outcome. In the context of youth ministry, this “other desired outcome” could be getting a kid to come to youth group, attend a retreat, or make a decision to follow Christ.

On the other hand, a relational ministry of place-sharing is one that values relationships for what they already are. The relationship is itself regarded as the end goal and the desired outcome. Root insists that place-sharing is what is at the heart of the Incarnation of Christ—the mysterious melding of man and God who shares the place of us all to the fullest extent of what it means to be human.

I found this rather convicting. How many times have I befriended a student because he or she was potential to grow the church’s youth program? How many times did I start a conversation with a kid because I needed to fill more seats in a van for our next youth activity?

The next day following the symposium I had dinner with a family from the church who has two boys in high school. Throughout the evening I learned a lot about the family and even helped stir the Risotto. I learned a lot about their family dynamic, the challenges of a blended family, and what life is like for them on a day-to-day basis. I wish I could say that these two boys attended youth group later that week. They were no-shows. But that’s not what it was about. I didn’t come to recruit more kids for youth group. I came just to share in their place—to share a place at the dinner table and hopefully a larger place in their family.

In some ways it's a lot easier this way. I don't have to worry so much about how many kids come to youth group. Christ never called me to that. Christ calls me to exist in loving relationships that give witness to the God's love through the Incarnation of Jesus.

6 comments:

Carol said...

mmmmmmmmmmhhhhmmmmm. good stuff.

Unknown said...

It's challenging to try to understand that sometimes we are called to just meet people where they are, and just listen and befriend...with no other motives. We're so caught up in an ego-centric society that we sometimes don't realize that we, in fact, are investing in relationships for a motive that isn't really about the person themselves.

Good post. Me likey.

Unknown said...

sorry...ric. iii is me, adam.

Tyler said...

i find this to be a battle...do ministry and love on people for no reason other than that we are called to. that is tough

Rachel said...

mmm...i like that! some great thoughts. AND, as a cynical ex-youth grouper, i can tell you that i could totally tell when leaders would chat me up to get me to come on the next retreat so they could tell their "aweosme Jesus story." ugh.

anyway, i love the concept of "place-sharing." i think it will be a helpful concept in nursing as well. i had that feeling as i stood next to a retching cancer patient the other night, but i just didn't have the words to describe the position i felt i was occupying.

Jess said...

I'm not going to be insightful but had to tell you that your Mom busted out the baby pictures of you the other night... MY DAUGHTER LOOKS JUST LIKE YOU WHEN YOU WERE A BABY!!!! Bwahahaha! Seriously! I think we are related...